Summer Excitement in Breaking Bad GIFs

SUMMAH IS HERE.  I’m just as excited as you are.  But do movies and TV give us unrealistic expectations of magical summers? As they say in France, le duh.  But guess what? You can still have an awesome summer.  Here’s how, according to the characters of Breaking Bad.  SPOILER ALERT.

1. Catch up on sleep

2. Go swimming

I feel dirty for laughing at this.

3. Get a summer job.

* maybe not this job

4. Pick up a new hobby

Jesus Christ Marie! They're Minerals!. .

5. Connect with friends and family

6. Take a summer vacation

7. Learn something you always wanted to

* take your time

8. Play some video games

9. Work through your backlog of movies and TV

10. Get rid of the negatives in your life

11. And add some positives

* P.S. I LOVE whoever made this

12. Do some soul-searching.

13. Maybe you’ll discover a new talent!

14. Remember not to take yourself too seriously this summer.

15. And don’t get into trouble.

16. Expand your culinary palette.

17. Read.  Read.  Read.

18. Plan a really great prank.

19.  Learn a new language.

20. Relax this summer.

21. You’ll thank yourself for all you’ve done come next fall.

 

22. Have a great summer, everyone!

– Julia

Funny/Wacky Moments During My Adventures In Skyrim

In an open world game as huge and in-depth as Skyrim, there are an infinite amount of crazy situations that the Dragonborn can get her(him)self into.  Even though I myself was late on the Skyrim train and thus missed some of its infamous glitches, I can still remember lots of times where I sat laughing or shaking my head at the screen because of whatever crazy thing was happening.  Having completed the main campaign and nearly all of the sidequests, I have a lot of experience in the world of Skyrim.  Here are my personal favorite stories/moments! After you’re done reading, share your own wacky Skyrim adventures in the comments! What’s the craziest thing that’s ever happened to your mighty Dragonborn?

1. Chicken Murderer

This was my very first crazy situation from the game and also one of my fondest.  After escaping from Helgen, I entered Riverwood and wandered around the small village.  Mind you, this was the very first time I had played the game and wasn’t especially comfortable with the controls yet.  That’s where the chicken comes in.  Dumb thing.  It came up to me, clucking its head off while I stood there, sword in hand.  By some accidentally-on-purpose mistake, I brought my sword down upon the doomed creature.  “Oh my gosh, I can kill chickens in this game!” I laughed to myself.  That didn’t last long.  I turned around to find the enormous blacksmith approaching me with a huge axe.  I quickly ran away as he and the entire population of Riverwood pursued me, enraged at the death of their chicken.  With no idea what was happening and not powerful enough to take them all on, I reloaded my save, effectively clearing my name as a chicken murderer for good. 

2. I Hate Mountains

Okay, so if you play Skyrim you know that everyone does the weird jumping thing to cheat their way up the mountains.  Finding the real path just takes too long! Anyway, I was on my own, attempting to get to the top of a mountain in order to get a Word of Power.  It was early in the game and I had only killed a few dragons so far, so when I heard that tell-tale roaring and the beating of wings, I got a little nervous.  But, dangit, I had to get that Word of Power! After defying physics for long enough, I managed to jump my way up the mountain but ended up in a weird spot.  Then the dragon attacked.  But not just any dragon.  A freakin’ Ice Dragon.  I realized that my usual ice magic wasn’t going to work and switched over to flames in order to slay the monster.  By having just enough health potions and determination, the dragon’s health began to dwindle, and I finally landed the killing blow.  Yes! The Word of Power was mine.  I took a step forward — AND FELL OFF THE MOUNTAIN.  I lost my save and my temper, and only my last bit of good sense prevented me from hurling the controller.  The next time, I just followed the stupid path up the stupid mountain. 

3. No, Please, I’m Only A Level 2!

The very first time I played Skyrim I felt completely overwhelmed.  Without really knowing what I was doing and not understanding that leveling up a bit at the beginning before you go off exploring is a very good idea, me and my follower skipped off into the woods looking for adventure.  That’s what you’re supposed to do in this game, right? Hmm.  We hadn’t gotten very far before I saw a little cottage in the distance.  It literally could have belonged to Snow White, it was so cute.  But Snow White wasn’t home that day.  As I approached the house this crazy Dark Elf in black robes came out, screaming at me for trespassing.  Confused, I stood there for a second and then he took advantage of my hesitation and threw a fire ball at me! What the heck, dude?! The fire ball had diminished my health so I took cover behind a rock and took a potion, standing up every few seconds to throw a spell right back at that jerk.  After literally like six or seven minutes of fighting, I was able to take him out.  Praise the Lord! I had used up all of my potions but I made it! Then a flapping sound echoed in the distance, followed by a terrifying roar.  “You’ve got to be kidding me,” I thought.  Nope.  A huge dragon landed right in front of the cottage, and immediately attacked me and my companion.  So I did what any noble Dragonborn would do.  I took off, panicking.  I hoped that I could run far away enough to escape it, but that thing chased me for miles.  I dodged its fire breath and ran into a few wolves along the way but I kept running.  I finally fell off of a cliff and died.  I didn’t play Skyrim for a while after that.  But don’t worry.  I got revenge and I raided that Elf’s cottage.  So there!

So what’s your wackiest Skyrim stories? Sound off in the comments and happy adventuring in the world of Skyrim! I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee and started a blog. 

– Julia

The Blank Page Ahead

As my senior year of high school draws closer and closer to an end, I’ve been thinking a lot about what’s next.  The big three questions as I like to call them have been buzzing around my head like electrons and, unfortunately, have been spreading their negative charge to my perspective.  Where should I go to college? What should I do with my life? And last but not least, am I going to be happy? These are normal questions that everyone needs to ask themselves, but in my brain, they’ve been turning into “I won’t do well in college anyway”, “I’m not doing anything important with my life”, and “I’ll never be happy after school”.  To a degree, I understand why some anxiety comes along with these questions.  But on the other hand, I’m trying to see it as something exciting.  To illustrate my point, I’m going to talk about Star Trek.

Help! I’m under attack by my future!

Although technically the Earth hasn’t been fully explored yet, I like to look at outer space as the real final frontier.  An almost completely unexplored territory, space is full of infinite possibilities for discovery and adventure.  Pretty awesome, right? Right.  But since space is full of unknowns, it can be scary and sometimes even dangerous.

A visual of my brain on a daily basis.

Thing is, the great Where No Man Has Gone Before is actually an excellent metaphor for our personal future.  It’s a gigantic unknown, an uncharted, unexplored place where you are the hero.  It’s just a big blank page waiting to be filled by you in anyway you want.  It may be dark and a little scary at times, but there are also infinite possibilities.  And we all need a little adventure.

So before you’re all like

Before you let yourself hit a brick wall

Before you let negative thoughts end your adventure before it even begins

And before all your worries drive you absolutely crazy

Just remember that the unknown future isn’t something to be scared of.  Don’t be afraid to go boldly into your own life.  It’s an exciting time, and surely in this crazy world only adventures, big and small, await you.

*Note: I am now adding the clapping Picard GIF to the end of every post.  It makes me feel super good about myself.

– Julia

 

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you!!! Wherever you are, whatever your situation may be, and whatever struggles you’re going through right now, just remember that there is always, always, something to be thankful for.  And guess what? I’ll add another thing to your list.  Presenting the stages of Thanksgiving Day entirely in GIFs! Please enjoy and have a wonderful day!

So first you wake up like

And then you plant your butt in front of the TV to watch the parade!

And you enjoy all the music and floats…

But everybody knows this guy is the real reason we all watch the parade

So after starving yourself all morning so you have more room in your stomach…

Your guests have arrived (or you arrive) and it’s time to eat!!!!

For the next hour (or two, or three) you turn into a perfectly designed machine with one purpose: to eat

When you are distracted with small talk and family conversation, you’re all like

But inevitably the “Oh, so are you still single?” question comes up and you’re just like

But internally you’re like

But then someone brings out pumpkin pie and you immediately feel better

Eventually the eating is over and although you want more you’re absolutely stuffed and may be close to death

But even though your body hates you you’re just like

And overall it’s been a pretty awesome Thanksgiving

But the best part? You wake up the next day and EVERYTHING IS CHRISTMAS

Happy Thanksgiving!

 

 

While I Was Away…

Holy cow it’s been nine whole days since I’ve made a post! To all of my amazing readers, I apologize! I haven’t been just sitting around twiddling my thumbs and watching Say Yes To The Dress though.  Here are all of the things I’ve been up to that have prevented me from blogging.

1. Playing gigs with my band

2. Practicing with my band and learning Christmas songs

3. Writing a paper

4. Writing a paper about how I wrote the previous paper

5. Writing the midterm assignment paper

6. Studying for the midterm

7. Taking the midterm

8. Modeling in a local fashion show

9. Ugly crying with joy over my new PS4

10. Hitting that busy point where essentials such as eating and sleeping are something you need to “make time for”.

So yeah, that’s what I’ve been up to lately! I’m grateful that God has put these things in my life to keep me busy, but at the same time, finding a balance between OH MY GOSH SO STRESSFUL SO MUCH ANXIETY GET AWAY FROM ME EVERY SECOND OF MY TIME IS PRECIOUS AND IF I FAIL THIS MIDTERM I WILL END UP AS A HOBO and “Oh no, I don’t need to get that done right now.  I can definitely watch 10 more episodes of Parks and Recreation in the mean time.  Wait, midterm, what midterm?” is tricky.  Hearing God’s voice in the din of our hectic lives can be even harder.  But I don’t think God is limited to speaking to us in absolute silence, although that is one of the best ways for us to listen to Him.  He’s everywhere.  He places events, opportunities, and people in our lives and speaks through them.  And maybe being silent doesn’t mean retreating to a cabin in the middle of nowhere (although that certainly sounds appealing sometimes).  Can we be silent anywhere? I don’t mean not saying a word at all, to anyone.  I mean can our hearts be silent? Can our minds? I know my mind is like the Energizer Bunny with ADD.  The average person thinks 50,000 thoughts per day, but mine certainly feels like millions and millions are going crazy in my head.  Oh, and that doesn’t mean that they’re intelligent thoughts or anything.  Most of them are crazy stories or characters I make up or hypothetical situations with a .1% chance of happening where I have to make a huge decision that will decide the fate of the universe.  A lot of it is just junk stuff though, i.e. worry.  And that’s a bigger waste of brain cells than reality TV.  One of the keys that I’ve learned to being interiorly silent is getting rid of worry.  Think of stressful thoughts and anxiety as some doofus with a megaphone that won’t shut up.  He insults you, doubts you, makes you feel bad about yourself, and just annoys you until you can’t take it anymore.  And every time you listen to him, the megaphone gets bigger and bigger.

He’s like this @$&^!*$* from Duck Hunt.  Grr.

So how do we shut this guy up? It’s simple: we have to shut up.  Because guess what? PLOT TWIST.  That laughing dog is your own subconscious! *gasp* And every time the dog – you – tells you something negative and you buy it, you’re cutting yourself off from hearing what God has to say to you.  Why? Because God only wants to tell us positive things.  Not like, “Hey, Julia, I’m letting you off the hook with that paper! Go do whatever you want to!” but “Hey, Julia, I know what you’re dealing with now and it’s all going to be ok because I love you and I will never leave you to handle it alone.”

That sounds like a pretty awesome message to me, but unfortunately, we let our crazy lives and all the worries that go with them get in the way of hearing it.  So, what I’ve learned and what I’m telling you here is to think happy! And trust me, I’m not this type of person at all, although I’d like to be:

It’s more like having a realistic yet positive outlook on life.  And yes, despite the awful, horrible crap that we all go through, despite the atrocious things humanity does to one another, despite that weight on your shoulders right now, and despite the fact that Degrassi is *still* on, we all have a reason to be positive.  A guy that maybe you’ve never even met or talked to died for you, specifically.  He didn’t die for the human race.  He died for you.  And He died for your mom, specifically.  For your brother, specifically.  For your friend.  Because He loves each of us personally and intimately.  And here’s more good news: you can trust Him with everything.  You can trust that when He says that He’s there for you, He will be there.  Basically, you are never, ever, ever alone.  So finally, being truly silent isn’t equivalent to becoming a mime.  Being truly silent is having a heart that blocks out the noise of negativity we try to tell ourselves and is constantly in union with God.  It’s almost like an unending phone conversation with God without the awkward silence on either end when you run out of things to talk about.  Sometimes it’s just knowing that He’s on the other line.  In our crazy, busy, noisy world, the silence of God is what gets us through with joy and peace.

– Julia

Teenage Cliches I Never Want To See Again

In a disturbingly borg-like fashion, many teenage girls seem to share a hive consciousness where they latch onto something and run it into the ground until you’re begging never to see it again.  Members of the hive who form their own personalities are immediately banished from the rest of the consciousness and left on their own in the wild, never again to be accepted back into the hive.  Sadly, most of these poor creatures end up as some predator’s lunch within a few days after their banishment.  Or they start a blog.  (See what I did there?) But seriously, why do girls (and guys) buy their tickets to ride on the Collective Train of Thought without trying to come up with something original? Yes, it was funny the first 100 times I heard it! It was even funny a few times after that! But say it one more time and it’s hard not to dream of Godzilla rising from the sea and smashing the cliche bandwagon, only to be followed by Mothra of course.

So without further ado, here are my top five teenage cliches that I never – ever – want to see again!

1. Bacon And Its Near-Religious Following

Yes, yes, I get it.  Bacon is very delicious.  And it is! But please, just stop with the “bacon is, like, MY LIFE” cliches.  It’s run its course as your favorite course. Oh my gosh, did you catch that? Up top.  No…? Okay.  Moving on.

2. “That Awkward Moment When…”

You know what, I’ll confess that I’m guilty of this one.  But seriously.  If everything is awkward, NOTHING IS AWKWARD.  And that is truly awkward.

3. Mustaches

This one is just sort of puzzling.  Why are girls so obsessed with men’s facial hair? And, like, those mustaches on sticks you get at claire’s…is anyone really going to carry that around and hold it above their upper lip? I say we should just grow real mustaches and be done with it.

4. “Teenager Posts”

haha ... thats all ;)

Teenager Posts

Teenager Posts

People, this is why teenagers get a bad rep.  It makes us sound like perpetually exhausted and hungry anti-socialites whose brains are made up of bitter and sarcasm.  Some of these are funny, but most of the time I just wonder if there’s anything appealing about being so miserable and sardonic.

5. GIRLS AND FOOD

Funny Confession Ecard: Everybody has a girlfriend and boyfriend, and I'm just over here like ' I love food '.

I am Italian.  I love food as much as you do.  But single girls, you do not have to overuse the “I don’t care about a relationship I just I love food” mantra CONSTANTLY.  Is food amazing? Yes, absolutely.  But just because you’re single you do not have to pretend like you’re a loser and the only thing that will ever love you is Taco Bell.  You’re way better than that.  You’re like, Sheetz, at least.  Kidding, kidding! My point is that just because you’re single doesn’t mean that you have to practically date your McNuggets.  Focus on appreciating yourself as just yourself.

So there are my teenage cliches that need to disappear.  Thoughts? Let me know in the comments and enjoy being single and eating your bacon while you twirl your mustache and experience that awkward moment when you’ve been reading teenager posts for three hours!

– Julia

 

A Nerd Girl’s Love Life Entirely In Superhero GIFS

Seriously, does anything need to be explained about this title? Let’s get started.

Fake dudes have been your comfort-zone crushes for a while now

And you’re hesitant to break out of your little world of capes and spandex

Because every time you try to meet someone it doesn’t work.  Expectation:

Reality:

But you still can’t stop wishing for a Superman to your Lois Lane

Especially when you’re painfully aware of how accurately this portrays your life

And there was that one guy…

But it didn’t end well.

So just when you’ve hit rock bottom by watching Hulk Vs. Wolverine/Hulk Vs. Thor for the 30th time…

You see somebody at school or work and suddenly you’re all like

 

Cuz he’s got the heart of Captain America

The brains of Bruce Banner

The brooding mysteriousness of Batman

The hair of Thor

And the swag of Tony Stark!

And you know that you’re a super-match made in Heaven!

But alas! Your love life seems doomed to be worse than even Wolverine’s…

Because this amazing guy already likes someone else

gif,avengers,Captain America,love

And at first you’re all

And then you’re all

But then you start to get REALLY mad like

CUZ IT’S NOT FREAKING FAIR

But when you stop and think about it, maybe you missed the lessons that all those comics teach us

That no matter who you are

And no matter what others say

You are super.

tobey maguire (97) Animated Gif on Giphy

With or without your dream hero.

Yes, I know the feels.  Soak it up.

Besides, there’s a new cutie in town who’s caught your eye.

Stay awesome.

 

– Julia

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Creepy Halloween Poem By Yours Truly

Ohmigosh, Halloween is only a day away!

In the wake of my insane excitement for one of my favorite holidays, I’ve written a creepy, gothic poem that I hope you guys enjoy! I also hope it freaks you out a bit.

Just to reiterate what I’ve said before, I’m not goth! To quote Lydia Deetz from Beetlejuice, I myself am strange and unusual and this is reflected in my writing.  So in case you’re picturing me like this:

STAHP.

Here’s the poem.

“Flesh and Steel”

The day I tried to laugh

And blood fell off my lips from the effort

Was when I knew I wasn’t right

So I looked inside and saw the machine

 

It whirred and smoked and roared and hissed

Greased by blood that was not red

— but black — black like oil coursing through my veins

 

And then I saw my heart hanged on a chain

One side was beating crimson, while the other

— I almost could not bear to look —

was cold and steel

Draining all my light away, choking it

with what I could not feel

 

I know, I know, it’s dark.  But I like creepy stuff and it’s almost Halloween! I’ll give you a poem about unicorns next time.

Thanks for reading and have a happy and safe Halloween! Let me know what you think about the poem in the comments below!

 

100 Things That I’ve Learned

One of my grandfather’s favorite things to tell me was that you learn something new every day.  I believe in that, but have found that life only teaches us when we pay attention.  I’m only seventeen years old, but lately I’ve been trying to listen to life’s lessons.   Here are 100 things that I’ve learned so far.

1. Let yourself learn something new every day

2. God isn’t in the thunder and the lightning, but in the whispers of our hearts

3. Push yourself to do better

4. Don’t be too hard on yourself 

5. God, family, food 

6. Nobody likes to listen to the dream you had last night.  Nobody.  

7. Popcorn tastes incredible on hot dogs

8. Don’t let your mind wander if you can’t bring it back 

9. Your mom can be your best friend

10. So can your dad

11. Everything in moderation

12. Listen to new music

13. Make sure that who you are is who you want to be

14. Nobody else can do what you were meant to do

15. You are never, ever alone

16. Appreciate nature

17. Think 

18. Write it out

19. Read the classics.  

20. Read the new stuff. 

21. Just read a lot, in general 

22. The Rain Song by Led Zeppelin is the best song to cry to

23. Take a risk.  Take a chance.  Make a change.  

24. Give social media a break

25. Call your grandma

26. Learn the family stories 

27. Popularity is ridiculously overrated 

28. You don’t need a million “best” friends

29. Money isn’t everything, but it’s important

30. You can’t make big decisions by yourself.  Pray a lot 

31. Be well-rounded

32. Be generous

33. Be grateful always

34. But don’t be a jerk

35. Always check to see if you have something between your teeth after meals

36. Be kind to your waiter

37. Do NOT order Italian food at a non-Italian restaurant

38. Don’t do things halfway

39. Let your walls down

40. Being vulnerable is not the worst thing in the world

41. Apologize, even if the other person doesn’t

42. Don’t freak out if you feel like your teen years aren’t the “best of your life.”  The best is yet to come

43. It’s never as good as it seems, it’s never as bad as it seems 

44. Please, cut down on the selfies 

45. Be respectful and polite to everyone

46. But don’t be a doormat.  That’s bad 

47. There is only one you.  Therefore, you are unique.  Let it show

48. Keep your promises

49. It’s okay to be sad

50. “Lighten up, Francis” 

51. Laugh at yourself

52. Don’t laugh at other people.  Laugh near other people. (Just kidding)  

53. Get out of your comfort zone

54. Just breathe

55. Don’t set your expectations way up in space.  That’s a good way to get disappointed 

56. Keep your standards high, though

57. Don’t forget your sense of humor

58. Put an end to procrastination (insert obligatory procrastination joke here) 

59. Develop your personal style

60. THIS DOES NOT MEAN ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING GOES 

61. It’s OK to be a nerd

62. It’s OK to be a jock

63. It’s OK to be a prep 

64. It’s great to be yourself

65. You have a talent.  Find it

66. Introverts are not better than extroverts.  Extroverts are not better than introverts

67. If you love something, show it

68. Don’t base your life expectations on TV 

69. Be eclectic.  You can like The Civil Wars and Avenged Sevenfold at the same time

70. Don’t live in the past

71. Don’t live in the future

72. You don’t have to agree with everything

73. Avoid cliches.  (anyone else tired of the bacon thing?) 

74. Don’t be ignorant, but please, if you like a celebrity DON’T READ THEIR WIKIPEDIA BIO 

75. Be a good listener

76. RELAX

77. Believe in Santa Claus

78. Give your mom a hug when you wake up

79. Let suffering make you a better person

80. Little kids can teach you important lessons

81. BUTTERFLIES ARE TERRIFYING CLOSE UP – http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20121119015627/spongebob/images/thumb/7/79/Wormy_Butterfly_Close.jpg/640px-Wormy_Butterfly_Close.jpg

82. Write down your inside jokes so you don’t forget them

83. Give things and people a chance, for crying out loud

84. Don’t live just to be “in a relationship”

85. Video games are art (try The Last of Us, Journey, or Kingdom Hearts if you don’t believe me) 

86. Be humble

87. You are loved

88. Ask questions and find answers 

89. Just care

90. Be proud of yourself

91. Get excited

92. Face your fears

93. Silence is golden.  Unnecessary chattering is that old penny you saw in the gutter with gum stuck to it 

94. Separate opinion from fact 

95. Let yourself laugh

96. Let yourself cry

97. Punch apathy right in the kisser

98. Just say no to uggs

99. Your life is meaningful

100. Make it worth remembering 

– Julia

Going On Vacation To An Amusement Park: Yet Another Presentation In GIFs

I LOVE going on vacation! Getting there can be a long and arduous task, but once you get to the amusement park/beach/city it makes it all worth it.  Let’s take a look at this process and fantasize about vacations that we will never go on (a trip to the Moon, anyone?) Today we’re focusing on amusement park trips!

So your parents tell you that you’re going on vacation and you’re like

And you immediately start shopping for clothes like

But packing them all is another thing and you’re like

Mr Bean Packing

So vacation day arrives and you have to wake up super early to leave like

And you have to wait FOREVER to check in with your airline like

And all of those airport security signs make you suspicious of everybody like

So you finally get to security and no matter how many times you’ve done it, walking through the metal detector thing makes you all nervous like

But when they clear you to go through you feel inappropriately triumphant like

So after making it through the entire airport you get on your flight and there’s that one annoying person who walks by you like

But you try to relax anyway up until the takeoff, and you’re all like

And once you get up in the air you try to distract yourself and read, but then you get airsick like

And you end up just sleeping through the flight like

But you finally get there and on the way to your hotel you’re like

You check in inside the lobby, and when you go up to your room and look in the mirror you look like

But once you freshen up a little you’re all like

So the next day you finally get to the park and you’re all like

And you speed off to your favorite ride like

And as you’re riding you’re filled with pure joy like

But later somebody asks you to ride the HUGE roller coaster with them and you’re like

But they make fun of you until you agree like

So you’re in line and your friend asks you if you’re ok and you’re like

You get to the car and the attendant straps you in like

And you’re FREAKING OUT like

And when the moment of doom hits and the roller coaster starts you’re all like

And you’re left at the mercy of this giant ride until the end like

So you eventually get off and you look like

And you’re on such a high that you walk away from the ride like an idiot like

And when your friend asks you if you liked it you’re just like

At the end of the day you and your siblings are bouncing off the walls like

So you go back to the hotel and throw up all of the cotton candy and ice cream you ate like

– Julia